There had better be justice…

Coalition of the Brave

It’s unbelievable to think that a cop can actually open fire without taking any time to check a situation out, then get placed on ‘admin leave’, having killed a person for… being inside their own fucking home?!

This is racism at work. Systematic, embedded racism. It runs deep into the core of various elements of society, all over the world, but somehow, it runs very deep in a number of pockets of US society (and please, my American friends, this is not aimed at you, for I know many Americans are as ashamed of this as I am). This should be a clear cut case of murder, for that’s what it is. Hysteria because ‘black person’ has led to an innocent woman being shot dead in her own home. There should be outrage about this at a national level. This is 2019. There is zero room for this…

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Three exercises for noticing small emotions

If nothing else, I find this subject interesting & I’m re-blogging to keep it available to me in the future.

If it helps any of you all, I will take all the credit for sharing it, of course. 😉 (Many kudos to the real hero in that scenario – the author, for some great tips.)

Love Uncommon

Historically, I wasn’t very good at noticing emotions when they are small. In fact, for the longest time I really only noticed emotions when they became too overwhelming to ignore. This was not an effective strategy. It led to really painful interpersonal conflict and meant I spent a lot of time running away from emotional experiences. These days I’m much more able to identify and name emotions when they are low-level, which helps me to identify my needs and desires and to communicate these more effectively. Much of the credit for this goes to the work I have done in being mindful of my emotions. Here are three exercises that I’ve found helpful:

1. Noticing emotional neutrality

Throughout the day you will most likely have moments when you don’t think that you’re feeling much of anything. These moments are perfect for pausing to notice whether anything more complicated is going…

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#WhyIDidn’tReport: Rapture Nightclub Doesn’t Care If Your Drink Is Spiked

Things Carla Loves

Imagine realising your drink has been spiked.

Imagine thinking that messaging the nightclub where it happened out of concern for yourself and other patrons.


Now, imagine you’re a dick who lacks empathy.

rapture response

You get Rapture Nightclub’s response.

Imagine you’re asked if you’re even WORTH being drugged.

Imagine that this comes after eight women were murdered by the hands of their partners last month.

Imagine all the fuckheads and cunts of the world screaming there’s no such thing as rape culture and it’s all just a feminist conspiracy.

And then, before you decide something, read the response from a Perth nightclub to a young girl.

Imagine if that was you.

Imagine, because you need women to relate to you for some of you to care, it was your little sister.

Your girlfriend.

Your wife.

Your big sister.

Your cousin.

Your friend.

Your daughter.

Imagine it’s you.

In Emergencies: 000

Lifeline Australia:…

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Thoughts on Trump’s “Impeachment”

It’s all over the news, and I feel I have to comment on it. I’m a liberal.  On the “Radical Scale” (that I just made up), I’m somewhere between “Elizabeth Warren” & “Bernie Sanders.”  That means I have all sorts of crazy ideas: Women are people; full-fledged, unique individuals who deserve to define their own… Continue reading Thoughts on Trump’s “Impeachment”

An on-point message

I really thought this argument was gonna go way differently when I read the first couple of sentences. Please read it all – it’s true.

Also, if men want to be involved in decision-making around abortion, & they want to keep a pregnancy while the woman doesn’t, they’re welcome to carry the child themselves.

Until then, anything anyone – male or female – says to a pregnant woman is an opinion. The ultimate decision lies with her. Suck it up. 😊

Coalition of the Brave

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Greta scares Grown men

Coalition of the Brave

Greta Thunberg. Remember her name. This 16 year-old has done more for the cause of combating climate change in the space of a month than world leaders and big businesses combined. In the process, she’s come under fire from bitter, angry old white dudes, who are threatened by her strength and conviction. She’s had a lot of criticism, but her statement (see the above link) is ample proof that she will not be bullied.

We’re at a tipping point, facing a very real climate crisis, something the vast majority of the world’s scientists agree is happening, and yet, rather than face these problems, people like Piers Morgan and Donald Trump, among others, show their sexism (not to mention a huge misunderstanding of mental illness) via their comments on Twitter and beyond. Despite some high profile attacks, Greta has not been unnerved; she forges on, with a cause we should…

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Taking your emotional temperature

I love this idea – simply recognizing you’re having feelings can make them feel less intense. I’m definitely going to try this out!

Love Uncommon

So, I’ve been spending more and more time feeling into my emotions, and I’ve come to the conclusion that the way I was taught to understand emotions as a younger person was dangerously wrong. You see, I was taught that emotions could be understood on a scale from sad to happy (and that you should really always try to be happy). It looked something like this:

happysadI’m guessing you can already see some problems with this approach. My life is rarely binary, and my emotions are certainly not. I do not operate on a happy to sad scale. This approach didn’t give me a way to communicate or express other feelings, such as guilt, fear, overwhelm, anger or disgust. It also didn’t give me an easy way to communicate complex feelings, where I was having more than one emotion at a time. 

Despite the happy to sad scale not working…

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Inhaling The NRA

The idea that companies promoted vaping as “healthy” is ridiculous. That’s what tobacco companies did when they had ads with doctors promoting their cigarettes.

It’s also what Big Pharma did, promoting Chantix(R) as “healthy.” I know people who have had serious psychological reactions, & I’d like to know how many poor people died due to that side effect.

Technically, what vape companies & Chantix(R) are saying is their products are HEALTHIER than smoking cigarettes.

Also, upon reading the information provided thus far, most of the patients have multiple health problems contributing to death.

That, & they bought their products on the street. Or made their own.

Banning the products will not help. Well, they will help tobacco companies & Big Pharma. Oh, & the drug dealer on the corner peddling pot vapes.



Vaping has been promoted as safer than cigarettes. Now, with six deaths and hundreds of previously healthy teens and adults suddenly stricken with respiratory damage, all blamed on vaping, there’s talk of banning the battery-powered e-cigarettes in the United States.

Vaping has become very popular. It’s a way to smoke without the smoke. Some kids even sneak the devices and puff on them in classrooms. They come in all sorts of flavors, like mango, tangerine, creme, bubble gum, and even Fruity Pebbles. Now, with a push by Melania out of fear her son, Barron (who Trump referred to as “her son”), Donald Trump is proposing a ban on flavored e-cigarettes.

Vaping is not healthy. Granted, health professionals who tell you vaping is bad do acknowledge it’s safer than cigarettes. But, banning the flavors isn’t a solution. The health risk is not in the flavors. According to doctors who have studied…

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The joy of comet relationships – Part 1

So, total truth to my people – I’m polyamorous. I have been for many years, even though I didn’t have a term for it.

As such, I’m still learning the “jargon.” I never had a name for these types of relationships, but hearing them termed “comet relationship” makes perfect sense. ❤

Love Uncommon

Let’s start at the beginning. ‘Comet’ isn’t all that new to the poly lexicon, but I’ve found lots of people that are unfamiliar with the term, so I’m going to start with what it means. The More Than Two glossary defines a comet as:

“An occasional lover who passes through one’s life semi-regularly, but without an expectation of continuity or a romantic relationship.” 

I couldn’t disagree more with the second half of this definition. A polyamory reddit post contains a definition that I agree much more with:

“A person that passes through your life repeatedly who is intense and awesome, and when gone you are still in contact with that person in some way, but they are not a continuous partner.” 

But it still doesn’t quite capture my experience with comet relationships.  I see them as having elliptical orbits like comets in space. My comet relationships are with people that…

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